Hope...

I had hoped to be writing this post to share our news of a new life and heartbeat that God had breathed into my womb... I had hoped to post a picture of the little heartbeat we anxiously awaited... I had hoped to share the incredible story of how God delivered the news of a new blessing in our family the day before the baby we lost was due to be born... I had hoped to celebrate my 33 birthday yesterday with a group of friends that have ushered me along this journey back to life after a time of grief...
Hope was replaced by despair yesterday... Today, I want to feel hopeless... we have lost another life. We have been told there is an unexplained mass behind my ovary, we have been told there is unexplained fluid in my pelvic area...we are told we have to wait until Monday morning for answers... so now we wait... wait in what anger? confusion? terror? feelings that have been flowing over in tears all day and night for the past 24 hours.
But again, now amidst the rain and the tears, hope is there. Hope that is directed by faith. I am writing now out of faith. My hope is now faith. I have faith that my God is not going to take this pain away from me or this process or these feelings away from me, I have faith he is going to take my hand and walk me right through it. I have faith he is going to hold my hand as I pen another line in my testimony that will one day be shared to reveal his glory. I have faith that even through all my anger and unrest at him, he will stand firm in his love for me as I continually crawl back into his arms for comfort. I have faith that one day I will enter heaven and will now have two children who never had to experience the pains of sin or this fallen world waiting for me with shouts and coos of "mommy". I have faith that again I will hope...because God is hope.

Lost in Busy Land...

I have been lost in what I call "busy land". A place where you are always busy, yet you always feel like nothing has been done. You always feel like you are moving full speed, life goes by with the blink of an eye, but your to do list keeps growing. Today though, I am thrilled to say I am caught up! Yahoo!
So from this day forward, I am never returning to busy land. I bought a one-way ticket back to " enjoying the moment land" and am staying here for good, or until Monday!
I have missed my little blog. Too much has happened to post about so I am going to recap and start anew with my next post...
1. Organized and awesome homeschool meet and greet with the incoming Senate President that had over 200 parents and students attend.
2. Chopped off most of my hair.
3. Started facilitating an awesome life class at our church called Family Driven Faith by Voddie Baucham
4. Watched the Gators start the season 2-0 with an awesome win over the Canes!
5. Spent two days annoying Lyndsey and Chris with what they love to call obnoxious Gator behavior.... jealousy
6. Started officially homeschooling Pace for his first grade year
7.Begun working on bringing Carole Joy Seid, an awesome speaker in the homeschool world to our church for a seminar.
8. Took a trip to Ocala with two fun, fun, fun couples and all the kiddos.
9. Ordered all my Palin gear to wear until the election...love her
10. took a deep breath...
Time to settle in...

Home

We are home. We are home after a 16 day vacation in the Bahamas. Yes, life is hard. We had an amazing time diving, fishing, body surfing (I was declared champion in the final round), shelling, spear fishing, and spending quality time as a family. The first half of the vacation was spent on Hope Town Island in the outer Abaco Islands. I LOVE this place, we have been visiting their since I was in my early teens. The island is only about 12- 18 miles long (depending on where you start measuring) and has only a few thousand year round residents. We have no cell phone or computer coverage so it is true vacation. Our days looked like this
1. Wake up to sunrise overlooking the ocean. I would go for a long run, the kids would play random games around the adults as they drank coffee, made breakfast and talked news and etc.
2. Head out the back door for the long 25 yd walk down the porch steps into the sand of our own beach where we would body surf, boogie board and build awesome sand castles.
3. Back inside for a rinse, lunch and a nap (adults included)
4. Back outside to repeat step 2.
5. Back inside to rinse, make dinner from the fresh fish, lobster and conch we caught that day. Baths. After dinner games of UNO, Zingo, or a short walk to the ice cream shop.
6. Bed

some days instead of the beach we would spend the snorkeling the national reefs. We saw AMAZING fish, sharks, HUGE starfish, coral...we would fish a lot (Pace caught the most) and then spear whatever we could. We would pack lunches, snooze on the boat, find other islands to picnic on...

It was a blast, I am counting down the 365 days until next year!

5 years of awe

I stand in awe of God's creation when I look at Pace, our oldest son. He is 5 today and what an amazing blessing he is in our lives. He is filled with such compassion for the world, a mind that never stops trying to understand far beyond his years, and a heart that is a picture of the purest love. Pace gave me my first understanding of what God's love for me as his child looks like, this was the most perfect gift on a special birthday.

Happy Birthday Boy!

Absolute Retraction

I am a woman of absolutes. I just think and then speak that way. Makes life a bit black and white but I like it that way. Others dont, but well I do. Like:
I absolutely believe their is only one way to heaven and that is through our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
I absolutely believe I married the greatest man in the world.
I absolutely would do anything for my children.
I absolutely think that Gator Nation is the greatest thing in college sports.
Until now, I have really never had to go back on any of my absolutes. Unfortunately, I was in for a big surprise last night. Dear friends of ours, the Askews & co. invited us over for dinner and some Wii action. Until now, my absolute about video games was...They are absolutely pointless and we will absolutely never have one in our home. I have to absolutely retract that statement and only say this... once I have saved enough rainy day cash we will absolutely be getting a Wii and I will absolutely have a boxing rematch with Courtney and Nancy as I was sucker punched! It was great fun and I am absolutely exhausted and sore from playing! Check it out, you absolutely wont be disappointed!

say cheese 2

here are some more updated photos from the next directory. if you click on the nighware, hats and mittens and scroll through the collections page, there are some other great ones...enjoy!

Say Cheese

Here are Pace's latest pics from Filou and Friends shoot. He is on some of the billboards over there I think. Check them out, he is getting too big!

If you go to collections and then click on Filou and Friends you will find most of the photos. After that, if you surf through the site, and go through the different options like "corporate", FAQ, and ect, you will see more pics of him. Enjoy!